Why am I doing this?

Ok, so I realized late in 2005 that an inordinate amout of stupid things happen to me. Things that make people look at me like maybe I should be wearing a helmet all the time. I usually call my cousin Kristen (who also has dumb things happen to her) and we laugh at the ridiculousness of it all and then we move on. But I realized that I wanted to start keeping track of HOW MANY stupid things really happen to me in a calendar year. So that's why I've started this blog.

Before I tell you about the incident that finally put me over the edge, here are a few highlights of the past year:

I ran over a ham in the parking lot of the mall I work for. How did the ham get there? How- out of 3,000 parking spots- did I choose the spot with a ham in it? The most classic line of the whole 'ham incident' comes from the housekeeping employee that came outside to help me clean it up: "I can smell ham, but I can't find it."

Soon after we moved into our house, I smacked my head on a pipe in the basement so hard that I almost passed out. The stupid part of this: The bar was level with my WAIST. It's not like I didn't see it. On the same vein, I also smacked my head on a towel bar at the cabin went I went to change the toilet paper roll.

And, the item that made me decide to start this blog: I fell down the stairs last night. Brian was snoring, so I grabbed a blanket and headed downstairs to my couch. Polly (our 'bad' cat) loves to chase blankets, sheets, whatever you happen to be dragging or fluffing and ran between my legs. I missed the step and literally bounced down 6 steps right on my ass. From Brian's perspective, it sounded like this: Bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump. "Ouch." The only positive: Brian let me have the bed.

So stay tuned, feel free to place bets on how many bruises, bumps, vehicle mishaps, etc. I rack up over the next year. And if you see me coming, you might want to duck.